This picture was emailed to me in Feb. by my great pacing partner, Korrie. She and I had the honor of pacing those with a 5 hour marathon goal at the Austin marathon. We had a blast, and I used it to cap off my goal race, Rocky Raccoon 50 mile. Wow, what a difference a year makes…right now I am challenged by 6-7 miles, when a year ago, I was starting to hit 25 miles runs, followed by another 10 or so the next day. I was pretty determined to get in good shape to undertake RR 50 and then the marathon pacing.
I got an email yesterday with the details of this year’s marathon pacing. It hurt to know that I won’t be there. Spec is due the same weekend as the marathon, so there is no way I could do it. I know Spec is way better than pacing another marathon, but a little part of me still wonders how much of my “old life” I’ll regain when all is said and done. Will 2011 be a combo Spec birthday pre-marathon pasta dinner for me? I hope so. I know ultras might be a challenge time wise after Spec is born, but I hope marathons and 50Ks remain part of my life. It doesn’t seem like too unreasonable of a goal, but I find everyday is another step into the unknown.
Sometimes lately I look around my home, and see all the reminders of how much I’ve been able to do up to now. Many nights I go to sleep in a Boston marathon t-shirt, I bring my lunch to work in a bag from the amazing MiWok 100K run, there is a cool piece of bottle cap art in my kitchen from the Rogue trail series, a little bronze horse anchors my bookcase from the my fave trail race, Sunmart, I have photos on the walls of my friends and I at races conquering our fears, and I can no longer fit into the belt that is adorned by my hard earned Bandera 100K buckle. It’s all just trinkets, but I like having all to conjure up the memories of all the good times I’ve had, and I am thankful for every mile and every minute.
An annoying little part of pregnancy is the insomnia. When it strikes regularly in the middle of the night, I try and think of pleasant things and not let my mind drift into list making, and what I need to get done. I imagine myself running along a trail, coming into an aid station, and Mike is there holding Spec, cheering me on. We all have big smiles on our faces….I continue on and eventually I finish the race and we all go celebrate together as a family. So yes, maybe this mental picture can become real in Feb 2011, as I finish the Austin marathon, and then we all go out together to celebrate the run, and Spec’s first birthday.